Remembering Mother

It's not just around "Mother's Day' that I think of my mother because she comes to mind quite often throughout the year. When I think of her, I don't linger on the bad things that occurred during her life that affected my life because she is still "My Mother". My memories are somewhat bitter sweet due to the fact that I wished our lives together would have been more stable than they were, but I know that life is filled with circumstances that affect us all in spite of the choices we could have made.

I did not have a traditional family life when I was growing up, having a Mother and Father living together to make a home for me because they were divorced when I was very young. It was because of a problem with my Dad drinking that my Mother decided to get a divorce. After all, it was not ingrained into her the value of a traditional family life with the parents raising their children, very possibly because my mother was raised in an orphanage herself, not familier with traditional family surroundings. Even though, I did not hold it against her for not trying to work out their problems because she was "My Mother"

For many years as I was growing up being raised by my grandparents, my mother lived a very tumultuous life as a divorced woman traveling around the country and engaging in a lifestyle that was not very pleasing to remember, but I don't remember her for that because she was still "My Mother". After I was grown and had a family of my own, realizing that their divorce had not been the best course of action when I was young, my Dad and Mother remarried and lived together for the rest of their lives.

After my Dad passed away, Mother spent many lonely and sad years alone, but found happiness being a part of my family and enjoying seeing her grandchildren growing up. It wasn't until she suffered a stroke during the last years of her life that the loneliness and sadness really set in for her that restricted her activity. Because of this I really felt saddened for her because she was still "My Mother".

During those last ten years of her life as she struggled to live her life in spite of her disability from the stroke she suffered, I tried to make her life as easy for her as I could, but I know that there was a whole lot more that I could have done for her because after all, she was "My Mother".

I don't ever remember being disrespectful or dishonorable towards her or holding it against her because of the loss of my having a regular family life because of the divorce and I don't resent what happened during all those years, because she was "My Mother" and the only one that I had. After all, I see it that God gave me to her for a reason, so should I resent what God made to happen? I don't think so!

Now all that I have left is my memories since she is gone and my memories usually consist of my sadness because of not doing more to make my mother's life life worth living than what I did.

So this might not sound like much of a tribute to my mother, but after all she was "MY Mother" and have always felt love in my heart for her and always will.

This is for you Mother, to be an everlasting memory & tribute from your Son.

Thelma M.Cox, 

1914 to 1989